Title: To Dream in the City of Slayers (Chapts 4 & 5 of 7)
Rating: hard R
Feedback: Suit yourself, just no permanent damage, k.
Disclaimer: Just playing with the pretty kittens. Unfortunately, they are not mine, but I will gladly groom and bathe them before sending them back home to Daddy (aka Joss/Mutant Enemy/et al).
Warnings/Squicks: slight BDSM, lots of graphically implied boy sex, some ppl might find the initial encounter offensive- it’s nothing bad, merely questionable
Summary: A variation on the old ’boys dreaming about each other’ theme- honestly, it started life as a PWP, but then Mys’ muse decided to wake up and stick a vague plot/storyline in there, hmph!
Dreaming 301/Reality 301: A Blurring of the Lines
Xander knelt on his carpet, hands bound and eyes covered as usual. The thrill he used to feel as the dreams began was quickly giving way to dread.
Master hadn’t come to him since the night Xander convinced his Master to stay with him. With every dream that Master didn’t appear, Xander’s heart broke a little further. The last few days his dream-self had even cried himself to sleep, and when Xander awoke in the morning his pillow was still damp with tears.
This time Xander simply curled up and cried. It didn’t matter- he’d driven Master away and what did that say about him? That he was unlovable. That he always screwed up a good thing. That even his dream-lover abandoned him.
Xander’s body was so wracked with sobs that he missed the soft footsteps approaching, the light thud of a heavy jacket being tossed aside, and even the scared gasp of his Master upon seeing his precious boy so distraught.
Without hesitating Spike scooped the boy into his arms, quickly releasing his wrists and seating them both on the bed.
Warm arms closed around him and broken words drowned in tears were uttered. Spike held the boy in his lap, crooning tunelessly, trying to comfort him- and possibly himself.
Five women entered the Summers’ living room, four of them trying to understand what had the fifth and youngest, so upset. It didn’t take long to figure it out.
Instinctively, Willow rushed to Xander’s side- Tara on her heels, while Joyce moved to check on the troubled vampire.
“I knew it wasn’t right. Gods, Buffy, they both sounded so miserable,” the teen wailed.
“It’ll be okay Dawn, let Willow and Tara check them out. Then if we need to, we’ll get Giles and make with the research.” Under her breath she added, “And when we find out it was all Spike’s doing, he’ll finally have that one on one with Mr. Pointy I’ve been promising him.”
“Uh, Buffy, I don’t think Spike did this,” the small redhead piped up.
Looking slightly abashed, Buffy leaned toward Willow, “Did I say that that loud?”
Concerned as she was about her boys, Dawn laid a hand on her big sister’s shoulder, “Nope, but we all know how you think- vamp-bad-Slayer-dust.” Patting Buffy’s shoulder she added apologetically, “It’s genetic.”
Buffy turned, preparing to chastise the younger Summers when a frightful wail brought her attention back to the men in her living room.
Not half a beat after Xander’s outcry, Spike began emitting incoherent sounds, but sounds which were undoubtedly supposed to be comforting- including a low soothing purr.
“I’m calling Giles.”
Buffy’s declaration was met with a chorus of eager nods.
Eventually, his love stopped shaking and the flow of tears ebbed.
Kissing Xander’s dark head, Spike carefully stood and, holding his boy tightly, managed to turn down the bed (a feat he owed to vampiric dexterity and a century of caring for Dru).
It wasn’t until he laid Xander down and released him in order to remove his own clothes that the human reacted.
Xander screamed, not a scream of terror or pain, but of loss and sadness; then whimpered, “No! Sorry, Master. Sorry. I’ll be good. Don’t go. Don’t go!”
Spike had the boy back in his arms after the first sound of his pitiful cry, “Shh, shh, ‘m right here.” Stroking the boy’s hair as he rocked him, “Not going anywhere, Xander. Love you too much,” then ever so quietly, “even though you’d kill me before you loved me.”
Xander’s keening subsided as he was lulled by Spike’s touch and the calming purr radiating from his Master’s chest.
As Spike lay soothing his beloved boy, he berated himself for the mockery his unlife had become. Not two years ago, he was the Big Bad out to add another Slayer to his belt and possibly take over the Hellmouth in the process. Now, he was biteless, a polyps on the demon community, and helplessly in love with one of the Slayer’s minions.
Right. This had to stop. No matter how much it hurt, he needed to tell his boy (at least the dream version) the truth. After all, this was only a dream, and, well, if it put a stop to the dreams then maybe he could salvage the ‘real’ world.
Decision made, Spike kissed and held his boy; etching every detail into his memory.
Somewhere in his exhausted, sleep deprived brain Xander wondered what Master had meant- there was nothing (short of discovering Master was actually Deadboy) that could make Xander reject him. Xander quickly went through the most likely possibilities:
-evil, mass-murdering psychopath- wouldn’t be the first time
-flesh eating ghoul- doubtful he would’ve ‘survived’ this long without missing some flesh
-a male Cordelia Chase- okay, some things just didn’t bare considering
-Deadboy- nope, too slight… Spike maybe
-a right-winged pigeon from outer space- erm… okay, definitely got the Bleached One on the brain
That’s it, no more thinking for the Xan-man, he was going to relax and sleep on Master’s rhythmically purring chest and he was ignoring that, outside of the possibility of cat-demons, he knew of only one human-esque creature that purred. Xander just shoved that tidbit in his mental lockbox along with Master’s lack of heartbeat, sporadic (at best) breath, and his always low body temperature. Xander’s dream-self was every bit as capable of navigating the waters of DeNile as his conscious-self was.
By the time Giles arrived, the men were sleeping peacefully, apart from Spike’s continued purring, and the women were in varying states of cooing, care giving, researching, and freaking.
“Giles, thank god!”
“Buffy,” the ex-librarian acknowledged. “How are they?”
Buffy snorted and rolled her eyes.
“Better now. Once Spike started with the purring Xan calmed down and they’ve been like this,” the young witch gesticulated towards the men, “for the last half-hour or so.”
Giles took a moment to study the sleeping forms. “From what little you’ve told me, it would appear they were in some form of shared dream state.”
“That’s what we thought,” Willow bounced excitedly. “We started researching what we could find on-line, but there’re just too many variables.”
“Naturally,” a sardonic edge to the man’s voice. “I suggest we attempt to put together a timeline and possibly a list of, well, symptoms, I suppose.”
“Oh, well, I know Xan’s been exhausted for close to a week now. I told him Tara could make him a sleep tonic, but he said no- something about sleeping wasn’t the problem, resting was.”
“Pfft,” Buffy huffed, “Figures, Xan’s having trouble sleeping, and Bleach for Brains has been downing enough caffeine to keep half the population of L.A. awake.”
Five pairs of eyes gaped at the blonde.
“Okay, what’s with the eyes- seriously giving me the wiggins here.”
“Oh, it’s nothing. It’s good. Really good. In a not-so-good-actually-kind-of-bad-means-t
“It does give us someplace to start. We should try to identify anything they both came in contact with prior to last week.”
The girls instantly started trying to reconstruct the past weeks and Joyce caught Giles’ eye and nodded him towards the kitchen.
“I hate to rain on your parade, but I think we’ll need to look farther back,” Joyce smiled apologetically, then set about explaining to the Watcher the highlights of her talk with the blonde vamp.
Dreaming 302/Reality 302: Successful Mergers
Xander felt himself waking up. He felt better and more relaxed than he had in days. Nuzzling his face against his Master’s smooth, firm chest, he muttered, “Master,” a satisfied smile brightening his face.
“Xander. Need you to wake up.” Spike tried to keep his voice level and free of the pain and fear that seemed to be running rampant through him. In another time and place he would’ve laughed at himself, realizing he sounded more like William than he had in close to a century.
“Master?” Xander questioned, fearful of anything that would have his lover sounding so serious.
“Xan, Precious, I need you to know somethings,” Spike swallowed hard. He brought Xander’s hand to his lips and kissed it reverently, “First off, I love you, more than you could imagine and I don’t want to lose you… but this has to stop. I can’t let you keep believing you care for someone, something you despise.” Cool burning tears were streaming down the vampire’s marble cheeks, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. He was losing his love, and he was doing it to himself. Lightly touching the blindfold, he told his boy, “Take it off.”
Terror and elation warred for dominance of Xander’s mind and emotions. On one hand, Master loved him! On the other… And now he was being allowed to see Master.
Gently, Xander removed the blindfold, giving his eyes a few moments to adjust before opening them. With a deep breath the young mortal opened his eyes and looked on the sensual creature he called ‘Master‘.
“Mom! Willow!” Dawn’s cries had everyone rushing into the living room.
Dawn turned scared doe eyes to her mother, “He’s crying,” she whimpered.
Joyce knelt by the blonde, petting his head with one hand while holding her daughter close with the other. “Spike’ll be fine, honey. I know it.” Darting a glance at the dark boy, “They both will.”
The elder Summers caught Giles’ eye, the pained look on the librarian’s face left no doubt that he understood hearts, if not lives, were being forever changed in a dream world they had no power over.
Clearing his throat, Giles momentarily drew attention away from the fitfully sleeping men, “There are some texts I want to check at the shop and perhaps Anya may have some idea as to what could cause such a prolonged occurrence.”
“Do you need any help? ‘cause you know me, always ready to make with the research,” Willow added quickly, she was worried about her friends- both her friends, and feeling useless wasn’t helping.
A warm hand caressed the vampire’s tear dampened cheek. “You’re beautiful.”
“Xander?” Spike didn’t know what to make of the mortal’s calm acceptance of the vampire. Then heated lips were on his, attacking his mouth like a newly rising Childe attacking it’s first meal.
Breaking away, flushed and breathless, Xander gasped, “Don’t care. Need you too much,” the boy’s charcoal eyes burned with the evidence of his statement. “Master,” he whispered, “Spike, I love you. Please don’t leave again.”
Spike held the boy to him and carded his elegant pale fingers through his lover’s nearly jet black hair, “Xan, pet, you can’t love me. Not really, not out there in the real world.”
“What if I do?”
Smirking, the lovelorn vamp replied, “Then you’re lying.”
“You’re not coming back are you?
“Dunno, pet. Probably not.”
Xander couldn’t fight the stinging in his eyes, so he let the tears silently flow. Spike was leaving, even if it was only dream-Spike, he was still leaving.
And now that he’d seen Master, knew the man he loved was the blonde pain-in-the-ass vamp, he was being forced to go back to a life of snark and quiet dismissal. With barely a waver in his voice, the heartbroken young man asked, “One last time. Please, make love to me?”
“Pet?” Spike’s emotions were on a roller coaster ride the likes he hadn’t felt since the day he was turned- hope, despair, love, hatred, acceptance, betrayal, fear, safety, an end, a beginning, confusion, awareness… The only things he could be certain of were his absolute love and adoration for one Xander Harris and that this would be the last time they would be together like this.
Secure in that knowledge, Spike did the only thing a lovesick, not-quite-as-evil-as-he-pretended-to-be demon could do- he kissed his love as if both their lives hung in the balance and proceeded to make sweet passionate love to him.
The bell above the door to the Magic Box jangled jauntily heralding the arrival of a potential patron… or one of the Scoobies.
Anya looked up from her intent scrutiny of invoices, “Oh, Giles, I thought you weren’t coming in today.”
“No, no I wasn’t,” hastily he added, “and I’m not. Merely need to check some texts.”
Anya snorted, “Okay.” Then bounced back to her invoices.
Before Giles ensconced himself in his office, “Ah, Anya, you haven’t noticed anything strange about either Xander’s or Spike’s behaviour recently, have you?”
Huffing in the manner of the long suffering and utterly exasperated, “Unfortunately, no.” She crossed her arms defiantly, “And it’s not like I haven’t tried. They’re just so stubborn, so… MALE!” The final word was spat from her tongue with a vehemence befitting an ex-vengence demon. “I’ve tried everything short of locking them in the store-room and that’s only because I don’t think our inventory would survive.”
In typical Anya-like fashion, the young woman completely misread Giles’ befuddled ‘what are you on about’ look for a curious ‘do tell’ look which she eagerly indulged. “It would be so much simpler if they’d admit they want to share their orgasms and get on with it. I wouldn’t even force them to let me watch.” Anya pouted for a moment, then continued, “You know, I even had Des help me with a sleep charm when I first realized. I thought if they could see each other without the trappings of vampire and Slayerette they’d work the rest out for themselves. Still don’t know why it didn’t work,” Anya shrugged, dismissing a piece of ancient history.
Swallowing, Giles found his voice, “Anya? What exactly was this charm supposed to do?” The former Watcher-librarian-dabbler-in-the-arcane had a sinking feeling he knew the answer.
“Hmm? Oh, nothing dangerous or permanent if that’s what you’re worried about. They were supposed to be in each others’ dreams for a few days- well as long as they were both asleep.”
Giles sat down heavily, “Dear Lord.”
“Giles?” Anya’s face scrunched up in a look of hurt confusion.
Coolly, “When was this?”
“It was part of why we broke up, not that Xander knows that, so over a year ago.”
“Over a year…” Giles couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Was it possible for a dreamlink to last that long? Was it possible for those caught in it to remain sane after that amount of time? Giles forced himself to take several deep calming breaths before he spoke.
When he thought he was ready he set his glasses on the table, rubbed his eyes and began very slowly and deliberately speaking. “Right now, Spike and Xander are at Buffy’s- asleep. They seem to be in some sort of shared dream state.”
Anya began shaking her head, “No Giles. There’s no way it could be my charm. For the link to have been sustained for this length of time they would have had to form some sort of bond, allowing the link to draw its’ power from shared and reciprocated emotions and that can’t be.” The ex-demon was getting agitated, “We would’ve seen it. Willow… Tara… Someone would have noticed! Wouldn’t they?”
“Calm down. Anya. Anya, this isn’t helping.” Standing, he exchanged places with the distraught young woman, settling her in the chair he vacated, and began to explain what they knew or at the very least suspected. “According to Joyce, the dreams have been going on for months. Last week, Spike’s dream-lover made plain their feelings and, until she forced him, Spike hadn’t slept since. He told her he couldn’t bear having the fantasy of someone he loved say they loved him when the real person despised him.”
Anya’s eye flashed a strange mixture of concern, frustration, and guilt. “How’s Xander?”
Giles let out a puff of air, “That’s harder to say. Apparently, he’s been having his own sleeping troubles- more than that, we don’t know.”
The shrill trill of the phone broke the heavy atmosphere. Giles, standing and therefore being marginally closer, picked up the receiver, “Magic Box… Willow slow down… We’re on our way, stay with Xander.” Hastily replacing the receiver on it’s cradle, Giles gathered his things- keys, coat, books, Anya- and headed out the door.