Title: Miles to Go (Chapt 4 of 4, Epilogue)
Rating: hard R
Feedback: Suit yourself, just no permanent damage, k.
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, neither set of pretty kittens are mine, and I must be content to merely play with them, but I will gladly groom and bathe them all before sending them back home to their Daddy’s (aka Joss/Mutant Enemy/et al, Kripke/McG/et al, respectively- oh, and a bunch of other corporate-type ppl who aren’t me).
Warnings/Squicks: post-Chosen, no such thing as S8, AU
Summary: Xander isn’t coping well with the aftermath of Sunnydale, but Willow thinks she may have found just what the doctor ordered…
***Chapter 4: Before I Sleep***
“You can’t be serious,” the dark vamp demanded.
“Not like you want me around here,” the blonde countered.
“So, you’re going to go with them and then what? What happens when they have to travel during the day? And blood? You have to eat and it’s not like Dogpatch is going to cater to the demon community.”
“What do you want Peaches? Y’want me and Xan to stay here? With you and your’s?”
“I just want to know you’ve thought this through.”
“Look, I love Xander and I want to be with him, where ever he is. You know him Angel, he’s not gonna stop fighting as long as he thinks he can make a difference. And frankly, I feel better about him doing this ‘hunting’ thing than working for you or the Council!”
“No Angel, I’m going with him!” With that final statement, the younger vampire stormed out of his Sire’s office, coattails flaring dramatically.
Angel sat back and smiled. He’d heard what he needed to hear. Now, to take care of his Childe.
Spike flopped down hard on the bed, “Remind me again why I can’t rip his throat out.”
“Because…,” Xander pursed his lips and looked thoughtful for a moment. “Actually, I got nothing. I guess he’s toast,” the dark human smiled as he crawled up to his vampire.
The vamp chuckled, holding his arm out to cradle the young man.
Xander wasted no time fitting himself against the blonde. Once he was settled, “So what’d Deadboy do this time?”
“Nothin’ I shouldn’t’ve expected. Always was a controlling bastard.” Spike nuzzled against the boy’s mop of dark curls.
“Well, Dean said he’d be ready to leave tomorrow night. Think you can keep from killing Broody for that long?”
In an overtly licentious tone, “Hmm, dunno pet- might could, if I had something to distract me.”
Xander snickered, allowing his hand to wander intimately over his vampire’s body, “Good thing distraction has always been one of my talents.”
Warm fingers trailed over the vampire’s chest, stopping to pluck at a pert nipple through the all too heavy cotton of his tee.
Spike quirked an eye at the beautiful man laying on his chest.
A wicked smiled beamed back at him for the barest instant before those tender lops closed over the cloth covered nubbin.
The vamp gasped, then hissed appreciatively as blunt teeth nipped playfully at his flesh.
Hands scrabbled at the blonde’s shirt, exposing creamy porcelain skin, demanding to be tasted. The large work-calloused hands then eased up, under the dark cloth, stroking and fluttering as they went. “You know I could do this for days,” the mortal rasped, “just touching you, feeling your skin. Hearing the noises you make, when you start breathing, those enticing little sounds when I find a particularly sensitive spot.” Xander brushed a nail over one of those spots as he said the words. Smiling in satisfaction when the small cooing whimper escaped the vampire’s lips. “Yeah, just like that.”
Blue-gold eyes bore into his lone brown one, begging, demanding, needing more, yet too afraid to ask for fear of losing what he had.
Xander leaned forward, holding the vampire’s gaze, stopping as their lips almost brushed and whispering so softly that, even to Spike, it was more like feeling the words against his lips than hearing them with his ears, “I want you, Spike. I want to be what you need. I want you to tell me, baby. Tell me what you want, what you need.” Slowly, lovingly heated lips closed over cooler ones capturing them in a forceful passionate kiss.
Spike wrapped strong arms around his human, trapping his hands against the vampire’s chest. Rolling them, he pinned his lover, his smaller but supernaturally stronger frame straddling him. “What I want,” the words rumbled like stones shifting before a landslide, “is you.” He ground against the man beneath him, “Is this.” A long fingered hand followed the contours of Xander’s face across his brow, from left to right, then down and over his cheek to luxurious kiss-swollen lips, “My beautiful, compassionate boy.”
As Spike’s gentle perusal swept back up his face, Xander quickly turned his head away from the sensual touch.
For a moment, Spike thought Xander was going to pull away from him as the hands still under his shirt slipped down, but he was pleasantly surprised when, instead of leaving, they clutched his slim hips tightly. Spike’s body blanketed his lover’s, his face nuzzling the young man’s neck, as he purred into his ear, “Xander? What’s wrong, luv?”
The young man shook his head, then turned quickly in an attempt to distract his vampire with a kiss. Xander thought his ploy had worked as their tongues danced against and around each other.
Spike on the other hand was using the situation to distract his boy. It didn’t take a genius, preternatural sense, or having been around for a few extra decades to suss what had upset his lover. In a move so fluid and natural, it was doubtful Xander would have noticed even without the distraction, Spike placed his hand on the man’s face- palm resting on cheekbone and ear, fingers laced into the hair on his scalp, allowing his thumb to caress the skin around Xander’s missing eye. Spike continued petting the area as he slowly disengaged the kiss. He felt it the moment Xander’s brain registered the unfamiliar touch causing his entire body to tense. “Why?” The vampire didn’t stop petting his lover’s face, piercing blue eyes filled with honesty, love, and admiration stared unwaveringly, “Hmm? You can’t think that matters; makes me want you any less? It doesn’t.”
The boy tried to look away.
“Xander, it doesn’t. You’re beautiful, inside and out. And anyone who can’t see that or thinks that this,” he brushed the useless eyelid, “makes you any less is either a fool or a liar.”
Xander barked a sad laugh, “Which does that make me?”
The vampire smirked, “Blind.” Before the young man could react, Spike kissed him. “Must be, can’t see your own beauty, and you want me. Only explanation I can think of.”
“I’m not blind Spike, but I think that infamous Aurelius insanity is finding new ways to manifest.”
Chuckling, “Nah, pet, I think I know from crazy,” Spike shook his head, resuming his task of removing their clothing. In a flurry of movement their shirts disappeared and Spike stood looming over the man he loved, jeans riding low on his hips, top button undone offering the promise of more. With catlike movements and predatory grace, he stalked up their bed, stopping to mouth Xander’s hardened flesh through layers of fabric.
The boy let out a pleasured moan, then an equally displeased whimper when the vampire’s attentive mouth left. He needn’t have worried, the vamp’s hands quickly replaced his mouth, skilfully working his flesh as he unfastened and removed his lover’s pants, followed by his own.
Spike lay his lean body over the larger man’s, both men gasping as their erections lined up pressing together.
“What can I do, treasure? How can I make you see your beauty? How special and perfect you are?” The vamp peppered the young man’s face with kisses, not overlooking a single inch of skin. “You are, Xander. Perfect. Beautiful. You deserve to be cherished.”
“Spike,” his voice raspy and small, full of disbelief and the faintest trace of hope.
“Yes, my sweet,” the vamp’s tender kisses continued unabated.
“Don’t,” he pleaded.
“Don’t what? Leave? Not a chance. Stop? Doubt I could, not with this,” he ran his hand down Xander’s tanned and muscled body, “tempting me. No, stopping ‘as to be the last thing on my mind.” The blonde vampire began kissing Xander’s taut, inviting neck, trailing kisses and nips down his chest. “I was think something more along the lines of,” he sucked a dusky nipple into his mouth causing his lover to moan. After a moment he released the puckered flesh and continued, “a complete, total, and thorough exploration.” Spike playfully bit the other nipple, then lavished attention on it.
Before long, his boy was writhing beneath him, words tumbling from his mouth begging for something, but never quite able to convey what.
With his lover virtually incoherent from pleasure, Spike retrieved the bottle of lube from the nightstand. Pouring the viscous substance on his hand, he began to prepare this lovely, beautiful, amazingly sexy human.
Spike lightly ran a finger over and around Xander’s entrance, teasing the opening as it fluttered at his touch. Slowly, his finger breached the tight muscle and Spike relished the feel and flex of his love’s inner muscles. “My gods, Xander, do you have any idea how gorgeous this is, you are?” The vamp easily eased a second finger into his boy. “All open for me, accepting, wanting. Nothing short of amazing, you are.” Spike spent a few moments mesmerized by the sight of his Xander impaled on his fingers. “Xander, I love you, with everything I have,” as the vampire spoke he slipped a third digit into the boy, fighting the urge to cum and claim as he watched and felt his mate’s response.
Mate. That was a sobering thought, but an incredibly appealing one. Spike could happily imagine Xander as his Mate and the more he thought about it, the more he wanted it. But not tonight and not like this. His Xander deserved more. He deserved candles and firelight, soft music, and softer bed. He deserved anything and everything Spike could give him, and he’d have it.
A wanton, needy moan secured Spike’s attention back on his boy and the here and now.
“Spike, please? In me… …please.”
“Do you believe me Xan? Can you see it? Your beauty, your desirability, your allure?”
Xander was speechless, watching the vamp- his vamp- prepare to enter him. Every move and muscle of the blonde’s form emanated love and longing. Seeing such emotion pouring from the perfect, sculpted creature, he could almost believe.
Amber rimmed eyes captured the young man’s gaze, “Need you so badly, Xander.” He lined himself up with his mate’s slicked waiting entrance. “Want you even more,” the vampire panted as he slowly slid into Xander’s body. “Oooooooh gods, Xander. MY Xander,” his voice shook with the raw power of being inside his love. His flesh was burning and he was loving every second of it. Fiery heat surrounding and engulfing him, warming his supernaturally sensitive flesh to explosive levels.
Reaching for his vampire, Xander inadvertently canted his hips, pressing the head of Spike’s shaft firmly into his prostate. He stifled a moan and clung to the strong form of his lover.
Swallowing hard, attempting to keep the sensations and emotions reigned in, “Xan, sweetheart, want you to look at me.”
The mortal didn’t seem inclined to listen.
“Love, want me to move, yeah? Wanta feel me inside you, sliding in and out, rubbin’ that sweet spot- just there,” the blonde shifted ever so slightly demonstrating his point.
Xander’s body virtually sang with pleasurable tension and a faint, even to vampire hearing, “Yes,” fell from his lips.
“Then look at me.”
This time, Xander did as Spike asked, pulling back and propping himself on his elbows.
“That’s better.” The vampire’s smile radiated love, “Now tell me what you see.”
Xander’s brow furrowed.
“Go on, luv, describe me.”
The vamp merely nodded encouragingly.
“Oo-k-ay. Beautiful, pale porcelain skin.” A hand unconsciously began to wander accompanying his words, “Abs a model would kill for. Strong sculpted arms- smooth and elegant. Same with your hands,” Xander brought said appendage to his mouth to kiss. “You have the face of an angel, so defined, so expressive- human or demon. And those eyes they tell anyone who cares to look everything about you. Gods, Spike, you truly are perfect.”
Spike pressed his forehead to Xander’s, rubbing noses in the ‘Eskimo kiss’ equivalent of a tonsillectomy. “You flatter me, pet.”
“Shh,” he gave his lover a quick kiss to ensure his silence. “That’s what you see?”
“Then answer me this, luv- would someone like you described settle?”
Xander’s eye widened.
“Would they be with someone they didn’t want? Would they love someone they thought for a moment was undeserving?”
Xander stared as with every word he believed a hair’s breath more and his walls of disbelief and denial slowly began to fracture.
Spike pulled out until only the tip of his shaft remained inside his boy. “No, he wouldn’t.” The vamp eased himself back deep inside his human. “He’d want someone to match and compliment him.” Pulling back out, “Someone beautiful,” and in- the beginning of a steady rhythm. “Strong- body and spirit. Loving. Loyal.” The vampire’s thrusts matching his speech as he hit Xander’s prostate in time, punctuating his words and sending ever more sensual spark’s through the man’s body. “Lips that beg to be kissed. Arms that comfort and protect. A body that demands to be touched and worshipped.”
Both men’s bodies vibrated with ecstasy, so close but neither ready to let go.
A few more thrusts and Spike stilled, their bodies flush where they were joined. “Xander,” he purred, “believe me?”
He wanted to believe, he truly did, but…
Then a cool hand wrapped around his dribbling erection stroking languidly, “Please, love, please believe- believe in me.”
Spike began slowly thrusting as he worked his love’s cock. “You’re so beautiful Xander- believe that or at the least know that I believe that. Know you’re wanted and needed. And know you’re mine as much as I’m yours.”
Xander gasped at his lover’s words- Spike was Xander’s!?! This beautiful, amazing, powerful creature was his!?!
The vampire couldn’t help but notice his love’s reaction. “I’m yours Xander, yours and yours alone.”
“Spiiike,” Xander keened, once again reaching for his beloved vampire.
Spike willingly and hungrily moved closer to the man he adored, lacing his free hand through the dark curls at the back of his boy’s head. He felt a deliciously warm hand grip his arm. It’s mate clutching Spike’s head and pulling him in for a heated and welcomed kiss.
If his Xander couldn’t believe his words, he hoped he’d believe what he felt. With that in mind, the vampire unleashed all the emotions and sensations and love he felt for and because of this sweet wonderful man and poured it into their kiss. There was love, of course, the sadness of feeling lost to those he cared for most, fear of never belonging, hope seen in a dark caring human eye, warmth in a remembered smile, jealousy sparked by another’s scent, anger that he couldn’t infallibly protect his love, overwhelming joy at being wanted, and even greater wonder at being accepted. All that and more flowed through the blonde vamp, through his cool lips and his talented tongue as he silently prayed to whatever entity watched over lovestruck demons to let his precious Xander understand.
Breathless and precariously on the verge of release, Xander forced words out of his body, “Wow, Spike I… had no idea.” Then finally uttering the words Spike had been striving, almost desperate to hear, “I understand. I know. I believe.”
Spike’s cock twitched within the heavenly confines of Xander’s body. Two long, deep strokes and a moan of ecstasy from his boy later and Spike was emptying his cool seed deep within the man he loved.
As the cool fluid washed inside him, Xander bucked into his lover, calling Spike’s name as his own orgasm ripped through him.
The two men had just stepped out of the shower when a staccato rapping came at the door.
“Just a minute,” Xander called, too busy towel drying his hair to notice his lover glaring and growling at the door.
As Xander moved to answer it, Spike’s hand shot out and he hissed through clenched teeth, “’s Peaches.”
The mortal turned, staring into Spike’s amber eyes, and kissed him soundly and full of unadulterated, brutal passion. “Well, let’s see what gramps wants then.” Xander moved back towards the door, “And Spike…”
Hungry blue-gold eyes shot to the human’s face.
“…put some clothes on.”
Both sets of eyes travelled down Spike’s bare body.
Xander licked his lips and gulped, “Please.”
Shaking his head, the vamp snatched his pants from the chair and slipped them on while his lover opened the door.
“Hey Angel. What’s up?”
“I was hoping I could have a word with Spike,” he said peering at the half clad vampire on the bed.
Moving from the door, Xander gestured the vamp in.
“You’re sure about this? This is what you want?” The elder vamp asked without preamble as he sat across from his blonde Childe.
“Bloody hells Angel, how many times do I have to say it- I’m STAYING with XANDER!”
Angel hung his head, “I thought as much.” Then, in a move that surprised both original occupants of the room the vampire smiled, “I had some work done on the Impala. Dean’s picking her up as we speak.”
“Peaches?” Spike couldn’t believe the implications.
Seeming to suddenly become very uncomfortable, the dark vamp stood, “You ever need anything- either of you-” he swept his gaze to assure both mortal and vamp understood, “call me.” And as quickly as that, Angel was gone.
Both men stared at the door, stunned.
“Did he just?”
“Yeah pet, he did.”
“And the car?”
“Guess we won’t ‘ave t’ worry about me going all combustible,” the blonde smirked and reached out, pulling his wonderfully warm, loving human to him.
All too soon, Dean arrived, anxious to get on the road. “You guys ready?” He asked the disentangling couple, “Or should I go and give you time for a quickie?”
“No, no, we’re good, ready,” Xander insisted as he grabbed up his duffle and headed for the car.
Spike threw on his shirt, boots, and duster, snatched up his own bag and followed the two humans outside. “Ready and willing, mate. Ready and willing,” he chuckled, closing the door behind him.